i'm definitely stressed out because i don't see the solutions to many issues that have been bothering me for sometime and i don't have the guts to face them. that makes me feel unaccomplished - in work & personal life - most of the time. trust me, it feels really shitty. i'm not saying that i'm defined by my achievment but hey achievment does make up a large part of my life or anyone's i suppose. when i'm in a crowd who seems to know what they are doing (maybe they just pretend to be
), it creates such a stark contrast to me that i just wanna shut up and be disappeared in the crowd. i just feel defeated and i hate it.
and then there are times when i mourn for why i was not born with a silver spoon. i know it sounds silly and immature but that's really the way i feel. money can't solve all problems but it's the key to solving many problems in life. but at the same time, the other part of me would say, "seriously your situation is not the worst in the world." yea i know i know...
and more often i just feel sad about my family. what more can i say about it? it's just deformed.
anyhow i don't think i can take the pressure any longer. i need a good cry.
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